Are You Experiencing A Lot of Fear About Relationships?

Whenever our relationship fears take over, we can be certain that there are feelings coming up inside of us. All of our issues with partnership are actually a great tactic we have used to distract ourselves from feelings that seem too painful to face. Our obsessions with unavailable people, detours from intimacy, and anger at those who “did us wrong,” are all ways to distract ourselves from feeling the feelings working in us.

Many of us have developed this trait to defend against feelings we think will overwhelm us. We fear that if we face our feelings, then nothing will be left. We fear we won’t be able to handle the pain; we think that we might die if we feel.

If you are feeling a lot of fear right now about your relationship, check in with your feelings. Feelings are the only thing we can trust and they need to be respected. We access our feelings by getting centered, meditating, talking to friends, or working with a counselor.

Today we have the miraculous opportunity to hear what our feelings are saying, which will heal our relationships.  

Relationship issues do not stick around to punish us or make our lives bad—they are actually hanging on so that we can get closer to ourselves. Then we can be more honest about what we need and want in a relationship. Then we can let in an emotionally available partner.

To learn more, visit www.theemotionallyavailablepartner.com

The Importance of Fun

How much fun are you having these days?

Whether you are single or in a relationship, it is so important to have a good time. The only medicine with no side effects is laughter. Today think of some fun things you can do for yourself and the one you love. Being lighthearted is one of the secrets of emotional availability. Nothing has to be so serious today. Let yourself play.

Single? Are you waiting to do some fabulous, exciting things for yourself until partner comes into your life? You don't have to wait. Think about things you'd like to try--thing that make your heart happy. Then get out there and try something you have wanted to do all your life.

In a relationship? Try some of those things that you have dreamed about doing with the one you love.

Emotional availability is about letting go of outcomes and making ourselves happy - then we can truly show up for others as a full, complete partner. Today think of things to try that will really make you feel good. You deserve it!

www.theemotionallyavailablepartner.com

What an Emotionally Unavailable Partner Does to Your Soul

In my journey to true love, I found several things to be true. There is no partner who is:

-So good in bed
-So rich
-So attractive
-So popular
-So sexy
-So powerful

that it is worth hurting my soul.

If you find you are constantly getting hurt with a partner who is fabulous in one or many of the ways listed above, think about what that person may be doing to your soul. If it hurts a lot to be with your unavailable partner, think about other options.

You deserve a great relationship that nurtures your soul, heart, mind and body. And that partnership is available to you at any time!

www.theemotionallyavailablepartner.com

Following Up On My Last Post

So let's talk practically about what happens if you are with someone who is not available--but are reluctant to take the plunge and let them go because of not wanting to be alone.

Well, its completely alright to do this; however, it will be more difficult to let in someone available if you are with an unavailable person. Not only will you be partnered, so that single energy that says 'I'm ready to meet someone great' won't be broadcasting, but you also will probably be consumed with the problems in the relationship with the unavailable partner.

I want to say that the real problem is fear. Fear of not getting what we want. Fear of being alone. We all deal with it all the time. It's debilitating.

Being emotionally available is about living and loving without so much fear. Of course, we are all going to become fearful from time to time. That is a reality. And fear can even be a good motivator.

But when we are so afraid to leave a toxic relationship, then we are hurting ourselves and the question becomes, "Why do I want to feel bad?"

It's worth asking this question and really listening to the answer.

You are an amazing person who deserves the best that love has to offer. You deserve an emotionally available partner. Hang in there and believe it because it is true. The love you dream of is just waiting for you to let go of your fear a little bit. And then, with that opening, an emotionally available partner can come into your life.

www.theemotionallyavailablepartner.com

P.S. - follow me and I will send you a free article on flirting!

The Universe is Not Late

When you find that you are trying to make a relationship work and nothing you do seems to make your partner happy, it might be a good time to stop and check in with yourself. Think to when you first started the relationship with this person. What were your motives? Were you feeling desperate? Did you feel like you needed to be in a relationship right away? Were you so lonely you felt like you might die?

Also, did you notice little red flags at the beginning that you tried to discount. For example, was the person not paying much attention to you? Did they always seem too busy to connect with you? Were they sending you mixed messages—saying one thing and doing another?

It is always OK to be in any relationship—the only question to ask yourself is if it feels good. Are you getting the satisfaction and fulfillment you want? If the answer is no, take stock of the situation. It may be that the relationship is not right for you.

But when you realize that a partnership is not a good fit, you may be pulled in two directions—you may be unhappy in the partnership and realize that; however, you also may not want to go back to the unhappiness of being lonely. Whatever you do is just fine, just know that there is a wonderful partner out there for you who is available and wants to be with you.

The universe is not late—an emotionally available partner is longing for you as much as you long for them.

 

www.theemotionallyavailablepartner.com

Staying in Love

Many of us have trouble processing feelings of joy and fulfillment in a relationship. We often want to immediately get rid of any feelings that seem to be “too much.” We may be tempted to push someone away or to withhold from them when we feel full of love. We may go to the other extreme, too, and desperately seek to get more attention to prolong the high. We can become a cling-on.

Loving emotionally means doing things differently. It means sitting with our feelings of fulfillment and truly processing the joy of our satisfaction in love. The quiet, joyful process of healing may be uncomfortable for us. We probably aren't used to it. But we learn a lot and get fulfilled when we sit with the feelings of fulfillment in our body and spirit.

Today, let’s remember that love experiences are here to nurture us. Love is not dangerous. Now we honor our ability to be fulfilled with the profound trust that wonderful new love experiences are coming our way.
Today stay grounded in your feelings of satisfaction with a person you love and let yourself luxuriate in what feels so good - the love of an emotionally available partner.

www.theemotionallyavailablepartner.com

Feeling Alone

It is a fact that you always feel alone when you are with an emotionally unavailable partner. I put the emphasis on always. There is always the feeling that you are not getting what you need.

It’s not a normal state to be in relationship with the unavailable type, but it may feel normal to you. That is because you may be used to not getting what you need. But always feeling lonely and needy in a relationship is a sign that something is wrong.

Before we talk about what to do if you answer yes when I ask you if you always feel needy in your relationship, let’s consider some of the reasons we may stay in unfulfilling relationships.

Put simply, we may do this because:

If we are in a relationship where we never get what we need and always feel lonely—at least we know the outcome. We know from the get-go that we will get hurt. There is no danger because we know in advance that we will be unsatisfied. As strange as it may sound, this may feel safer than the ‘risk’ of loving an emotionally available partner. If we are with someone unavailable, we never have to be intimate. And for those of us who are afraid of intimacy—afraid of being vulnerable and showing others who we truly are—then being with an emotionally unavailable partner makes perfect sense. It’s a no-brainer.

But, the problem is that the way we are trying to take care of ourselves may no longer be working. If you are reading this blog post, you may have gotten sick of being hurt all the time. You are probably sick of being in pain all the time—being lonely all the time.

If this is the case, change is possible. There is an emotionally available partner out there who is eager to meet you and share love in the type of partnership you want. Getting the love you crave can be done. Hang in there, and journey to true love as countless others have done before.

It works!

www.theemotionallyavailablepartner.com