When you find that you are trying to make a relationship
work and nothing you do seems to make your partner happy, it might be a good
time to stop and check in with yourself. Think to when you first started the
relationship with this person. What were your motives? Were you feeling
desperate? Did you feel like you needed to be in a relationship right away?
Were you so lonely you felt like you might die?
Also, did you notice little red flags at the beginning that
you tried to discount. For example, was the person not paying much attention to
you? Did they always seem too busy to connect with you? Were they sending you
mixed messages—saying one thing and doing another?
It is always OK to be in any relationship—the only question
to ask yourself is if it feels good. Are you getting the satisfaction and
fulfillment you want? If the answer is no, take stock of the situation. It may
be that the relationship is not right for you.
But when you realize that a partnership is not a good fit,
you may be pulled in two directions—you may be unhappy in the partnership and
realize that; however, you also may not want to go back to the unhappiness of
being lonely. Whatever you do is just fine, just know that there is a wonderful
partner out there for you who is available and wants to be with you.
The universe is not late—an emotionally available partner is
longing for you as much as you long for them.
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